Did we need wet unboxing videos? No. Did anyone ask for wet unboxing videos? No. Should there even be wet unboxing videos? Again, no. Is there a reason that a prepackaged egg sandwich should be sent to a watery grave? Of course there is not. The fact of the matter is that these wet unboxing videos are an affront to a dry God. And yet we find ourselves here, wet unboxing videos in hand, and so we watch. Behold:
Your typical unboxing videos feature consumer items like iPhones being opened on dry land. They’re kind of pointless, but they’re mostly harmless and maybe sort of relaxing. These awful videos, from a YouTuber named Alex Frost, are different. They feature items, usually food, being opened underwater. They are bad and they should not exist.
Among the many elements that make these videos so delightfully upsetting is the use of uncanny valley British supermarket foods. Rustlers, Ginsters, Weetabix: these videos have all the brands you neither know nor love. In one video, soup flows like vomit from a milk carton. In another, a ploughman’s sandwich is sent to Davey Jones’ Lucite Locker.
It is hard to say exactly why Frost has made these videos, but indeed the sea is unforgiving and inscrutable. Today Poseidon claims something called a chicken and mushroom pasty as his mistress; tomorrow perchance he calls out for thee.