As far as modern Canadian musical royalty goes, it’s hard to beat Celine Dion and Drake. After all, one covers all the things Barbra Streisand does, but with more songs about boats, while the other covers, well, most other genres of major music. But while that’s all well and good, what if you could somehow combine their power? What—we ask, skirting blasphemy with every word—if there was a Drake who somehow carried with him an image of Celine Dion’s face?
In fact, the former Degrassi star has joked in the past about getting just such a Dion-worshiping tattoo, to go along with the graven images of Denzel, The Beatles, Rihanna, and more that already dot his frequently photographed flesh. Dion herself has now weighed in on this prospect, though, and there’s not a lot of moderation in her response: For the love of Christ, Aubrey, please do not do this thing.
The above video was recorded by iHeartRadioCA this week, and it’s just the latest piece of evidence in the case of Celine Dion Being Pretty Funny, Actually, Especially Considering That She’s Celine Dion. It starts slowly enough, with the massively successful singer breezing her way through questions about shoes. But then she gets on the topic of Drake permanently affixing her face to his skin, and she seems to come to life:
Please, Drake, I love you very much. Can I tell you something? Don’t do that. You can write me love letters. You can send me autographs for my kids. You can come and visit. I can have you home for lunch or dinner. We can go for a drink. We can sing together. Whatever you want to do. I can talk to your mother. Whatever you want, but please.
Anyway, we can now add Celine Dion to the list of famous female performers who seem slightly creeped out by Drake’s passionate obsessions with them. Or, to put it more politely: “Please don’t tattoo. If you do it, just do a fake one.”