Permanently creased actor and occasional blues-rock satirist Bruce Willis will blot out the sky with his own personal musk this Thursday, releasing a line of cologne, hair and body wash, deodorant, and shaving balm under the name Bruce Willis. That’s it: Bruce Willis. So when people ask you what’s that smell, you’ll say, “Bruce Willis”—which, in the totally unbiased opinion of the CEO of LG Health And Beauty Systems, is “the manliest scent in the world.” Marketed under the tagline “Smart Guys Live Forever,” Willis’ fragrance will remind fans of the many cocksure characters he’s portrayed through its “notes of grapefruit, pepper, and vetiver,” because no one would buy a blend of stale whiskey, smug, and male pattern baldness. Anyway, those last two are just concepts, not fragrances, so that doesn’t even make any sense. Duh. [HT to Gawker]