After decades of attempting to make it the television business, Bob Newhart has finally won his first-ever Emmy for his guest-starring role on The Big Bang Theory—thus ending a six-nomination losing streak, as well as a five-decade streak of biding his time on stopgaps like The Bob Newhart Show and Newhart, all in the hopes that someday The Big Bang Theory might notice him. Adding to this historic honor, Newhart’s award was handed out as part of the Creative Arts Emmys, a classy affair that isn’t tainted by airing on television, where any yokel can watch it.
Newhart wasn’t the only first-time, incredibly leggy winner last night: Heidi Klum also picked up an award for successfully repeating her programmed set of phrases without accidentally blurting out anything about ethnic cleansing on Project Runway, sharing the victory with poor Tim Gunn who didn’t even get his photo or name on the winners’ page. And Melissa Leo picked up her first-ever Emmy for her guest-starring role on Louie, as well as for introducing the phrase “strap on the feedbag” into the nation’s sexual lexicon.
Other big winners you’re just getting to read about: Carrie Preston and Dan Bucatinsky picked up guest-actor accolades for their roles on The Good Wife and Scandal, respectively. Louis C.K. took home an Emmy for writing on his HBO special, Oh My God. Loads of technical awards went to HBO for Game Of Thrones and Boardwalk Empire, as well as for Behind The Candelabra, a movie that won eight awards in total—including those for best hairstyling, best prosthetic (and non-prosthetic) makeup, and best thing that has ever been done to Rob Lowe’s face.
Finally, South Park took home best animated program, Children’s Hospital took best short-form live-action program, and Undercover Boss won for best reality program, despite the many bosses who went too deep undercover and were changed, man. It’s like you don’t even know who’s the boss anymore! Anyway, you can read the full list of winners here; just don’t do it on television, please.