Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Providing yet more grist for the faux-French liberal elitist theater critic mill, Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark has had its opening delayed for a fifth time so as to allow the musical to “fine-tune” certain aspects of the show—including its all-new ending, as well as the total amount of money it can take in during “preview” performances before said critics are finally allowed to warn audiences off with their reviews. Spider-Man’s new opening night: March 15, the Ides of March, a date that would seem to be openly baiting the show’s many soothsayers predicting further disasters based solely on past ones. But by that point the show’s producer Michael Cohl believes they will have had enough time to “fully execute the creative team’s vision.” He is a dreamer; let us leave him.


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