Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Become a world class runner with the Paul Ryan time calculator

It’s been a busy two weeks of pomp, circumstance, and fact-checking as the country's two major political parties have been holding their conventions. One of the most hotly contested speeches of the week was that of Vice Presidential candidate Paul Ryan, who apparently gave a speech that kept fact-checkers busy. But the one untruth that people have clung to is the fact Ryan grossly exaggerated a marathon time, something he says was a mistake but anyone who has ever run a marathon will tell you is hard to do because you remember every miserable mile. (I’ve run three and can vouch for that.) So the Internet has responded in kind and given us the Paul Ryan Time Calculator. Just plug in your time, select the distance you’ve run – anywhere from 100 meters to an Ironman triathlon – and boom! The calculator uses a Paul Ryan formula of time and space manipulation to give you your new Paul Ryan-approved marathon time to impress friends and fellow cocktail party attendees the world over. Just don’t go bragging too much about it. (And yes, if there's a reasonably entertaining analog that disses a Democrat, we'll run that, too. Great Job Internet! is a non-partisan machine.)


Share This Story