Last week, Barkbox, a monthly dog pampering subscription service providing various toys and treats for your pooch, unveiled its “Overstuffed” November product line-up. Most of the items were pretty innocuous—Rabbit and sweet potato-flavored jerkies and a turducken stuffed animal? Adorable and delicious!)—but one entry in particular caught more than a few customers’ eye: a “Big Honkin’ Pigs in a Blanket” chew toy, which
maybe, to some perverted minds, kinda sorta absolutely looks like a friggin’ Fleshlight sex toy. Even Fleshlight thinks so.
While many, if not most, companies faced with an internet dog-piling (yep) onto their embarrassing, hyper-sexualized goof, BarkBox is not that company. No, like the animal to whom they cater, they don’t care who sees their horniness, be it whether you’re at home on your laptop, or in the park just trying to have a nice afternoon out with your damn family.
In a hilariously lengthy response post, Barkbox blog editor Stacie Grissom laid out their position on Big Honkin’ Pigs in a Blanket, which in essence boiled down to: “Y’all got some nasty-ass minds, but who are we to judge?” This is a company who has made not one, but two “red rocket” dog toys, after all. And while they were content with their original intended imagery—just some cute pig tushies—they did not anticipate the internet being quite as filthy-minded as it is. Which, honestly, that’s on them, not us. I mean, look at this thing.
It’s totally a Fleshlight. They also went on to insinuate that, really, every dog toy can be a sex toy, if you’re creative enough. Anyway, apparently it’s a hit, since Big Honkin’ is currently out-of-stock on their site.