Rabid fans of Clay Aiken—who self-identify as "Claymates" living in "Claynation"—worked themselves into a civil war so devastating that it caused the unthinkable: The shuttering of the Official Fan Club Message Board over at clayonline.com. Apparently, such drastic measures were taken because of the "extensive unrest and disrespect" between—according to one insider—"the batty members that are still clinging to their heterosexual fantasies of him and others that don't harbor such illusions." The website's administrator also cryptically threatened further action, saying, "Please note that should tensions continue on other areas of the fan club, severe consequences may occur." Fortunately this doomsday scenario never came to fruition: As of today the message boards seem to be back up, meaning the Claymates must have reached some sort of diplomatic agreement. You can now breathe easy.