Beyoncé doesn't really have tons of burner emails, but you'll still never contact her

Less a human than a phantasmagorical being of near-Euclidean perfection—especially on the internet, where any criticism will not be tolerated—Beyoncé Knowles nonetheless occasionally has to step down off the platinum-encrusted cumulus cloud that ferries her from gala to gala in order to communicate with the hoi…

MSNBC cuts ties with Sam Seder after giving in to “alt-right” smear campaign

In a year that has already seen it come under fire for passing on Ronan Farrow’s domino-tumbling exposé of Harvey Weinstein, as well as for letting Matt Lauer run rampant across decades of pay raises, NBC is at last taking a principled stand against media figures who propagate sexual assault—and naturally, completely…

Netflix executive denies Danny Masterson rape accusations right to accuser's face

Recently, an LAPD investigation into rape claims against The Ranch star Danny Masterson had “inexplicably stalled” despite “compelling evidence” against him, leading Leah Remini to suspect that the Church Of Scientology—of which Masterson is a member—has been protecting him. Some people believe there’s a similar…

LL Cool J has become the first rapper to receive a Kennedy Center honor

Donald Trump skipped this year’s Kennedy Center Honors—the fourth time a president has done so in 40 years and the first time that it didn’t involve a national emergency or convention—but The New York Times says that his mere existence still cast a bit of a stupid shadow over the evening. Iconic TV producer Norman…

Woebegone radio program Prairie Home Companion has yet to decide its new name

In an attempt to distance itself from longtime host Garrison Keillor—who was fired from Minnesota Public Radio last week for “inappropriate behavior”—the long-running radio show Prairie Home Companion is being renamed. On Saturday nights at 7 p.m. ET, public radio listeners will now tune in to Town Hall. Keillor…

Turns out that history is full of bitches badder than Taylor Swift

Listen, no offense to Taylor Swift—building a $280 million media empire at 27 years old is an impressive achievement—but, no matter how many shades darker she takes her lipstick, she will never be “pirate queen of the South China Sea” badass. Over the weekend, this point was made over and over again, in a rare moment…

Neil Young's complete archives are now streaming online for free

Back in April, we reported that Neil Young was working with a company called Orastream to develop a new streaming service called Xstream that would present high-quality audio files that could adjust to lower qualities based on a user’s internet connection and computing power, all at a reasonable cost that would avoid…

Hank Azaria says The Simpsons is “thinking about” making changes to Apu

Lately, The Simpsons has been getting called out over Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, its Indian convenience-store employee character voiced by white guy Hank Azaria. The strength of this backlash is mostly due to writer-comedian Hari Kondabolu, who recently turned a fiery (and funny) monologue about Apu into a 50-minute…

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Thank god, Disney is pulling that long-ass Frozen short from Coco screenings

Regardless of whether they went to see Pixar’s Coco for its thoughtful, beautifully-rendered yet overdue look at Mexican culture, moviegoers were required to be more patient than usual ahead of their feature screening. In addition to the commercials and coming distractions, Disney tacked on a short film that not only…

Trump’s competing with Kim Jong Un and the Dreamers for Time’s Person Of The Year

For a while there, things didn’t look good for Donald Trump being named Time’s Person Of The Year for the second year in a row, a title we must remind readers and apparently the president that isn’t a superlative along the lines of “Best Hair” or “Most Likely To Succeed At Kicking Off World War III,” but an…

Phase 1 of Cards Against Humanity’s plan to stop the border wall is complete

As the majority of Americans sit back in disbelief, watching the legalized form of bribery that is the American political system of donors and elected shills enact some of the worst and most blatant class-war legislation in more than a decade, realizing our repeated phone calls (you have been calling, right?) raging…

Billy Bush comes out of exile to confirm that’s Trump on the Access Hollywood tape

It is December, which might explain all the snow jobs coming out of the White House these days. Aside from Trump’s lawyer claiming to be responsible for the tweet that seemed to cop to obstruction of justice—despite all the questions it raises about a personal attorney having access to the president’s Twitter account…